As a Gen-Xer you have business ingrained in your soul. And if you can do business you can truly do love.
Now that you got the house the car, and the career…what’s next? Love of course.
For you, Gen Xer, I’m sure the ides of success revolves around career. That’s just a fact. You came into this world after your mother had burned her bra, made her way into the workforce and then left you to our own devices. You learned by example, career is king.
This just explains why you’re so damn independent and cautious at the same time. You watched your parents work hard and that’s who you learned from. So, even though you know what it takes to be successful in business you still long for that personal connection that was missing in your childhood.
This is why your heart can say you want a relationship and your essence says you don’t. Knowing this is half the battle. Know there is nothing wrong with you. You are who you are, you are exactly where you want to be, and you are capable of having life exactly how you want it. But it won’t just fall out of the sky and into your lap. It’ll take strategy.
You know strategy like the back of your hand. You’ve used so much strategy up until this point in your life. You had a strategy to get into the college you wanted to go to. Then you used strategy to find the job. You used strategy to pay down debt and get the car you want and to live where you live. You have attained a few notches on your belt, but there’s just one more thing to attain that keeps calling your name. Success in business and life in general isn’t enough for you.
It’s no secret you want to round out your life with a healthy relationship. But you feel stuck. Why? Because, you do business like its second nature, but relationships not so much. Trust me you can change that. You’re going to have to take the same approach you take towards business and apply that to your personal life.
While reading this you may be thinking, “I’m good, I don’t need a relationship” and that’s cool. I am not a believer that you have to have a relationship to have a fulfilling life. However, if “relationship” is on your mind and wanting one is in your heart then ignoring it is taboo.
Honoring all of your dreams and desires is one of the greatest forms of self-love.
How do you attain that next notch on your belt? What does it look like? “Do I even want a relationship?” might be the first question to ask. Consider this the dating advice before the date.
Get a few steps closer to that notch starting with the following 5 – steps.
Step 1 – Ask yourself hard questions
“Do I want to be in a relationship or do I just want what relationship represents to me?”
Journal into that question. Use a moment of silent meditation to allow yourself to clear out the mind clutter.
If you do really want a relationship you can continue…
Step 2 – Clearly define what it is you want
- Do you want a serious relationship?
- Do you want a husband and kid(s)?
- Do you want a very active/fulfilling dating life?
Be very specific with what it is that you want. Just like you did when you were looking for that job, that car, that house.
Step 3 – Break free from the bondage of keeping your desires a secret.
Think about it. When you were looking for a job. You didn’t just secretly tell one person or post on one job board. You exuded I’m available for work and I am valuable enough to get what I want. That’s how you go that job. Why not do the same for a relationship?
And do it from a place of unapologetic power.
When sharing with people you can use phrases such as.
“I’m ready to add relationship to my list of success. So if you know someone seriously available let me know.”
“I’m availed for a relationship now. So I am actively dating”
Avoid making self-deprecating, self-doubting, or complaining comments.
Step 4 – Evaluate areas that may be holding you back and get coaching or counseling to help you move past those obstacles.
You cold tackle some of those obstacles on your own, by reading books watching videos online related to the subject. In most cases you would want a little bit of accountability and guidance.
So weigh all your options
You can Google counselors in your area with the specific challenge you may be having.
Step 5 – Make a plan.
- What are your next steps?
- Is your plan clear?
- What needs to change in your life to make room for what you want?
- What daily or weekly behaviors will you implement to get you steps closer to what you want?
- Who will you implore to help you?
Making a plan and sticking to it is half the battle. Don’t be afraid to want what you want. Own it like the Boss that you are.
What if you get what you want and you don’t like it? Act like a CEO and adapt and overcome. You go back to step 1 and redefine what you want, then repeat steps 2-5.
If a relationship is your what’s next for you then don’t hesitate to go after it.
I am here to help if you have any question or would like to schedule a FREE Love Strategy Session. So you can get on track to attain the love your heart desires.